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***Being In the World, not OF it

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Being in the world but not of it

***Expert Q&A: How to Recover from a Bad Mood

The Top 3 Current Weight Loss Products on the market:

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The Fat Loss Factor is A 12-week online weight loss program that involves a comprehensive diet and exercise regime in combination with supportive activities such as goal-setting and stress management.

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In a column about relationships, it's easy to overlook that the number one person you must always relate to is yourself. Yet, sometimes, when circumstances make us veer off our usual course, we get irritable, pessimistic and just plain old down in the dumps. Here are some tips to help you strengthen your positive coping skills, gain a perspective, a sense of control and feel better.
1. Be aware, know your physical reactions. Make friends with your body. Be on the look-out for your body's personalized ways of signaling you that you are stressed. Do you get headaches? An upset stomach? A racing heart? Do you feel as though an elephant is sitting on your chest? Knowing and recognizing your somatic symptoms will allow you to get into solution mode quicker.
2. Link your physical reactions with your emotions. Now that your body's warning signals have put you on alert, name the emotions that usually trigger these reactions. For example, if your stomach churns every time you have to give a presentation, you know that you are feeling anxious. Or, if you feel listless after a negative review or fight with your partner, then you know that you are feeling depressed.
3. Identify similar situations and physical reactions that have happened to you in your past. To paraphrase the famous philosopher and writer, George Santayana, if you can't recognize your past situations, you just might end up repeating your unpleasant emotions and not be able to change them. Our present--and future--is connected to our past, whether we like it or not. Imagine, for instance, that all your negative experiences with bosses are lights that are strung on the same chord. When one bad experience happens, your other unpleasant ones light up, too. Of course, the brain-body connection does not work quite that simply, but many memories and the feeling associated with them get activated in the brain. When you can identify past similar situations, you are more able to develop targeted strategies to adjust your mood.
4. Make a list of the successful steps you took in the past to change your mood. If a technique worked once, it might work again. When one of my clients became depressed after months of job searching, she realled a similar time in her past. She remembered how she volunteered to build her resume and connections. She also recalled that she sent out many more queries than she sent out this time. Apply any successful solutions that worked for you previously. Adjust them to fit the current situation.
5. Develop positive self-talk. If you have been successful in the past with similar situations and negative moods, make a list of the solutions that worked. Make a list of all your accomplishments and positive attributes. Think about all the words of encouragement you used to make you feel better. Usually, these pep talks address two distinct processes:
Restoring a positive self-view
Getting a perspective
In the example where my client was not seeking employment productively, she restored her self-view by making a list of her educational and career accomplishments and her positive characteristics. She felt good about completing college and a masters degree while raising two children, and she reminded herself that she is hard-working and ethical.
She also recalled her parents' criticism of her. They said she was "not the smart one." By connecting her past to her present mood, she was able to lessen the impact of her parents' words by saying to herself, "They were wrong."
She got perspective by recalling how long it took her to find a job in the past and how she is not alone. Millions of people--good, decent, smart people are also out of work.
These pep talks prevented her from giving up--or beating herself up emotionally.
6. Smile and laugh. Read the funnies, recall fun times, look at photos from vacations or holidays. In other words, activate the pleasure centers in your brain and use them to jump-start positive feelings. When we feel happy, we beat the blues and become more productive.
7. Connect. Call a friend, send an e-mail. Social support soothes us. Join a support group or develop a buddy system where you can call a friend who can empathize. And one of the best medicines is to do volunteer work.
8. Do a task. Sometimes bad situations overwhelm us so much that we can't get anything done. Set a goal to do at least one task a day. The act of completing a goal can make you feel more in charge.
9. Change your setting. Get up, go for a walk, take a hot shower, run an errand. Changing your environment signals your brain to activate different neural connections. People often, for example, come up with ideas and solutions when driving or taking a bath.
10. Develop gratitude. Make a list of all the things that make you feel grateful. You might think about your health, your family, your job or anything that makes you feel luckier than the people you hear about in the news. Sometimes, when we realize that we are lucky, we are also motivated to give back.
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Anorexia Nervosa, Bulimia Nervosa And Compulsive Overeating

The Top 3 Current Weight Loss Products on the market:

Lose Weight Fast System is a diet and fitness system for the female body that has taken a new approach to weight loss for women.

The Fat Loss Factor is A 12-week online weight loss program that involves a comprehensive diet and exercise regime in combination with supportive activities such as goal-setting and stress management.

Customized Fat Loss is a nutrition and workout program to help you burn off unwanted body fat and lose weight so you can get that great, healthy and sexy body.



Eating disorders have become quite a well known problem, with millions of people affected. Eating disorders are a disease that is progressive and incurable and the same type of disease as any other addiction. The sufferer is trapped in a helpless cycle of obsessive and compulsive behavior and unable to break free of the need to escape feelings and control.
Eating disorders are more common than most people think - not everyone with an eating disorder appears to be skeletal, although this does happen in severe cases. Many people with eating disorders are not at death's door and their lives are still relatively manageable, but because eating disorders are a disease that is progressive, the condition will worsen over time to a point where they will need help and their lives begin to fall apart.
Many sufferers are able to hide their problem and appear fine to their friends, family and associates. Yet on the inside they are trapped. Eating disorders are also a common problem for people with other addictive habits. Many people seeking treatment for drug addiction, alcoholism or any other addictive behaviors come to realize that they have an eating disorder accompanying their drug problem.
There are three main types of eating disorders that are well known and experienced. Aside from these three, many other types of disordered eating are documented including selective eating and body dysmorphic disorder.
The three most common types are Anorexia Nervosa, Bulimia Nervosa and compulsive over-eating. However, most eating disorder patients display traits of all three types as the root problem and this is generally the same in all sufferers, yet the action of dealing with these compulsions may be different.
Anorexia Nervosa
When an eating disorder manifests as Anorexia nervosa, the sufferer will starve themselves until death. Anorexics have an incredibly low self esteem and generally suffer from massive self hatred.
They have a need for control and dominate this need by restricting their food intake to virtually nothing, which is of course an irony as an anorexia nervosa sufferer is incredibly out of control in terms of being able to stop. A person can be diagnosed as an anorexic when they have reached a body weight of less than 85% of what their minimum weight should be according to their height and bone structure.
Anorexics have many tricks and cunning methods of losing weight and avoidance of eating food. Despite the anorexic being obsessed with food (generally an anorexic will think about food 100% of the time because this is a natural reaction of the body being exposed to starvation), their problem is not with food. Food is the medium through which they are able to fulfil their needs, yet the problem rests within the anorexic themselves in their behaviour.
Anorexics have an intense fear of gaining weight and/or getting fat and will do anything in their power to prevent it. Pretending to eat and hiding food, excessive exercising in secret, lying about weight loss and eating habits, wearing baggy clothing to disguise a thin body, distorted body image and excessive obsession with food and calories are all habitual tendencies of an anorexic.
Because the disease is so all consuming combined with the immense strain and damage to the body, an anorexic will become extremely depressed and aggressive. Visible symptoms of the disorder are obviously an immense weight loss, stopping of the menstrual cycle (in women), excessive exercising and a fear of food, a fine growth of hair on the body due to the body being incapable of generating its own heat due to lack of fuel and secretive and controlling behaviour around food. Death is the prognosis if the disorder is left untreated.
Bulimia Nervosa
Bulimia Nervosa is a disorder in which the sufferer will binge on food; sometimes enough for a small group of people, and follow this binge with some kind of compensatory behaviour to avoid weight gain. Compensatory behaviour is usually purging (self-induced vomiting), use of laxatives, excessive exercise and fasting. A bulimic will also have secret eating habits and an enormous fear of food and calories yet their body weight will usually remain normal or even slightly overweight due to some calories being absorbed by their bodies before they manage to purge.
Bulimia Nervosa is an escape from unbearable feelings. Also based on control, the bulimic is trapped in an unbreakable cycle of needing to binge and purge. Bulimics plan binges and purges and once they have binged, they go to immense lengths to be able to act out on their compensatory behaviour. Behavioural symptoms of bulimia are a person eating enormous amounts of food without gaining weight, secretive behaviour around food including stealing, disappearing to the toilet after eating, exercising heavily after eating and starving for a few days after eating.
Bulimia is incredibly stressful on the body. Sufferers may have bloated faces and glands, scars on their hands from rubbing their knuckles raw with inducing vomiting, cracked lips, rotten teeth and bad breath as well as bad skin condition. Because of the stresses placed on the body by consuming laxatives, vomiting and over exercising, the electrolyte balance in the blood of a bulimic will be imbalanced. The body also has to cope with the stretching of the stomach from bingeing. All these stresses put a bulimic is at risk of a heart attack, split larynx, burst stomach and intestine and organ failure.
Compulsive Overeating
A compulsive overeater is a person who is addicted to eating. They have no control over their bingeing but do not follow this with compensatory behaviour. The act of eating is intoxicating to them, just like a drug.
Compulsive overeaters are generally morbidly obese and have major health problems due to the excess weight.
As with anorexics and bulimics, a compulsive overeater has very low self worth and self hatred. This is the cause of a nasty cycle of self abuse - sufferers will over eat and then feel bad about themselves and then eat to avoid the feelings, after which they feel worse and on the cycle continues.
The symptoms of compulsive overeating are an inability to control consumption of food despite the consequences and the wish to be smaller and be able to control their eating. Secretive behaviour around food and eating such as stealing food, lying about eating habits and severe weight gain are also key symptoms.
Treatment
The treatment of an eating disorder in its most severe form will usually require inpatient treatment at a treatment centre. An eating disorder is a problem which has been ingrained and compulsively acted out on for years. These behaviours take time to break and mend and intense therapy will be required. The use of a Twelve Step Programme and a daily programme of recovery is necessary to make sure that the sufferer will not slip back into the old behaviours again once they have left treatment.
In therapy the behaviours will be addressed as well as patients eating a healthy diet and exercising, depending on their health.
With proper care and treatment in a nurturing environment, an eating disordered patient will be able to regain control over their life and learn to love themselves. Treatment will be a difficult time, but if the sufferer really desires help to arrest their condition, then they will be able to lead a normal life with a daily programme of recovery.


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